Puzzles

I’ve always liked puzzles.
The way the curved and arched edges
fit together smoothly in a perfect unity,
like two hands interlacing their fingers.
Language is like a puzzle.
The way the sounds interact,
fitting together just right
to create a big picture
that you can’t see until you find the right pieces.
Sometimes the morphemes change,
just to confused you,
like a ragged edge that should fit someone else
but doesn’t quite.
Once the puzzle is together you can step back
and admire the beauty of God’s handiwork,
until you notice a piece missing
or a child stumbles over and knocks the edge apart.
Then you just smile
and go back to work,
appreciating the beauty of change
and the stimulation of challenge.

My life is like a puzzle.
All lives are, really.
All lives are part of a bigger puzzle,
Yahweh’s puzzle of Creation,
but each piece is a puzzle in itself.
As I’ve grown I have seen the pieces
from my childhood slowly fit together
with new pieces.
It is exhilarating.
Knowing that God designed each piece
knowing just where he would place it
before it even existed.
Each piece is a new journey
that I have seen fit in to my life
in harmony with the rest of my puzzle.

But now I see two puzzles.
One puzzle is my life,
full of my experiences,
joys, trials, and dreams.
This one I have always watched
and seen God leading me through it.
But the other one is me,
my character, identity, and personality.
This one is more pointy,
not as gently curved as the first.
There is pain where each piece meets the next,
but the pieces fit together just the same.
This puzzle is in the dark,
not as clearly illuminated –
there is only one lamp on the table.
I sometimes wonder
who is building this puzzle.
Is it God?
or me? or sin?

But God is the puzzle maker.
I do not know where the puzzles come together.
I can only trust that they do.
Though the designs are so different,
maybe the one
just has not come into the light.
It may be
that one day I will find
the second puzzle has not been flipped over.
And when it is,
it will fit right in
with a satisfying thunk
and complete the foundation
of my puzzle.

Psalm of Lamentation

This is a psalm I wrote for an assignment in a class I'm taking this summer.

Why, O Lord, have you turned your face from your people?
Do you not hear our pleas for mercy?
All day the faithful cry out in anguish,
And the righteous grieve all the night.
How long will you remain distant,
Until you come in all your glory to establish your kingdom? 

O good Creator, we weep for the sins of our nation,
For the perversion of the law and your good earth.
Remember this nation which you brought into existence,
With the desire to see righteousness upheld.
See how the people follow after the idols of the land,
And sacrifice justice for power and wealth.
The people no longer are stewards over the land you have given to them,
It is defiled in the pursuit of their idols.
See also their disregard for their own families,
They hold their brothers in contempt and murder their children in the womb.
The people hate their neighbors and themselves,
They do not believe they are made in your image. 

Restore us, O Lord of our fathers, and deliver us from our sins,
Save your people from our wicked pride.
For you are a merciful and compassionate God,
Who hears the cries of your people.
Although we grieve for our fallen nation, we trust in you, the Almighty,
Who will not let the faithful perish.

To My Teachers

No one ever thanks the teachers

Sure, they get "thank you" sometimes
Maybe once or twice a year
People give them lovely gifts
To express their gratitude

Some teachers did more harm than good
Others simply did their job
These had very little impact
They are shown appropriate gratitude

There are some teachers
Who understand
Who challenge students
Who help them grow

There are some teachers
Who support dreams
Who are parents
Who teach more than the class

They understand bad days
They appreciate laughter
They value hard work
They see what no one else can

Here's to my teachers
Who after thirteen years
Have shaped my life
In indescribable ways

I owe so much to these
And there really aren't words
To show how much I love them
All I can say is

Thank you.

Leaves

A gust of cold wind

Shakes the trees

The brisk autumn air

Alive with color

Leaves fall in the wind

Millions of leaves fall

In a single forest

All at one time

How can a person

Watch them all

One at a time

And follow the path

Of each leaf

As it falls to the earth

It is impossible

To watch them all

And see the paths

On which they travel

But there is one

Who is able to see each
To watch carefully
To catch and guide them
Along the journey
And it is in Him
Who guides my path
That I trust

Self-Destruction

It’s so painful
watching her self-destruct.
And wanting to help
but not being able to.
Seeing her hurt
and then hurt again.
Wondering why
she doesn’t learn.
What is there to do
but watch and wait?
Someday she will learn

not to play with fire.
But until that day
all there is to do is watch
and wince with her.

A Bowl of Ice Cream

The biggest bowl of ice cream
The biggest chocolate bar
The most slices of pizza
The longest movie marathon
The best books
The funniest TV shows
The softest kitten
The loudest cat purr
The most cuddly teddy bear
The most expensive jewelry
The highest telephone bill
The cutest pictures
The deepest cut
The worst tears
The biggest hole in the wall
The loudest shouting
The hardest run
The most beautiful song
The longest poem
The most “I love you”s
Cannot come close to replacing
The company of a loved one

Today

I have a problem
With my comfort zone
And the lack of desire
To leave it
I do not wish
To be uncomfortable
And so I do not
Step over the threshold
I am weak and weary
I have succumbed
To laziness
I still desire
That all be healed
But I lack
The drive, the energy
(Dare I admit, interest)
To get up and act
I'm comfortable here
Maybe I'll get up
Tomorrow or the next
But if I don't move
How can I grow
And so how do I live
To live, I must live
Today